This is a pretty self explanatory series, most of which are from 2022-2023. Alphys is my gal and I love her. She deserves the world.
Alphys breaks her treasured Mew Mew Kissy Cutie Limited Edition Deluxe figurine, and has to get glue from the True Lab. She does singing on the way.
Haha this was written at 3:00 AM because I was sick of not seeing any works that were just Alphys doing Alphys things. And I was listening to Fishy Love at the time (look it up on YouTube) and I thought of this.
Alphys lay quietly on her bed, running her claws over the blanket. She should get up. Probably. But she was tired. Alphys reached a hand onto her bedside table, and heard a concerning clunk as she knocked something off. That was either my glasses, or my phone. she thought. After fumbling around for a while, she finally grabbed her glasses off the table and was able to find her phone. But… her phone was on the counter. So what had fallen off? With a gasp of horror, Alphys leaned down over the side of her bed.
No!
The worst thing that could happen!
Because there, lying in two pieces was her Mew Mew Kissy Cutie Limited Edition Deluxe figurine. Frantically, she scrambled out of bed, and grabbed it. "No no no no!" she said, frantically trying to push the head back onto the anime girl's body. But it was useless. Alphys sighed. It'd be fine with glue, but… she'd left the glue in the lab. And she really didn't want to go down there.
But… It was just for a minute. It wouldn't be that bad. Besides… she could just… Before she finished the thought, Alphys was pulling the lab coat that was mainly used as a dressing gown over her pyjamas and scrabbling around for her headphones. She plugged them into her phone, and scrolled through her playlist… Can I Friend You On Basebook… Doki Love… She clicked on Mew Mew Returns Season 5's opening, bopping her head to the music as she shuffled into the lift.
Okay. The glue would probably just be in the power room. Probably. Hopefully. The door opened, and she switched on the lights, humming nervously. The power room was almost straight ahead. Just one corner. She speedwalked along, and into the power room, grabbing the glue off the floor. She sat cross-legged, precisely applying glue before sticking the figurine's head back on. Phew. Fixed. She walked a lot more happily back to the lift, singing along to the song that had come up on her playlist.
"Ooo, we break the laws of attraction,
Like you're sent from up above,
Got a case of fishy love!
Ooo, we're like an improper fraction,
Hope this ship gets safe to shore,
Though I'm really quite unsure."
Carefully not dropping the figurine, Alphys danced along to the peppy beat as the lift took her back up.
"Yeah yeah yeah!
She's always turning to violence,
I'm always turning to science,
She's so determined she's timeless,
And I'm so nervous I'm silent,
What if she finds out I'm lying?
What if she sends me home crying?
Why can't I just be kawaii?
And I'm like,"
As the lift reached the lab, Alphys danced out, singing even louder.
"BABY, BABY, BABY, YOU'RE SO FINE,
MEW MEW KISSY CUTIE, YOU'LL BE MINE,
CRUSHING, CRUSHING, CRUSHING ON UNDYNE-"
Oh. God.
The human.
The one she'd been watching on the cameras.
Was standing right there.
Staring at her.
Alphys was about to die of embarrassment.
The song she's singing is Fishy Love by Griffinilla. Because it's funny to me. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
I dunno.
Edit: The singing WOULD have been in italics.
Ao3 said No.
(I took the liberty of editing the formatting now because. It just looks better.)
Alphys has a date with Undyne, so Mettaton takes Alphys clothes shopping.
Haha how do I tag this I don't even know...
Alphys shyly shuffled after Mettaton as he led her into the mall. "Are you sure-?" she asked before he interrupted.
"As I have said a hundred times, Alphys. Yes. I am sure. You'll be fine! You're with me!" Alphys swallowed nervously, and tried not to make eye contact. "Besides, I come here all the time, I'm sure they'll have something good enough for your date!" She looked around, barely able to read some of the signs- their font was worse than her handwriting- and followed Mettaton inside one of the shops. "Let's see… Dress?"
"What?" she replied, snapping back to the conversation.
"Do you want to wear a dress?" Mettaton asked.
"Oh- um… yeah?"
"Good, now I know where to look." Mettaton bustled off, the click of his heels audible over the pop music playing from the mall. Alphys trailed after him, finding Mettaton rifling through a rack of short dresses. "Hm…" Mettaton muttered to himself. "Yellow would be ridiculous, but navy, or purple, and of course there's always pink-" Alphys stopped listening as she spotted the prettiest dress she'd ever seen. It was black, and sleeveless, with a high neckline and a flared skirt. There were little silver stitches along the bottom of the skirt, giving the impression that it was a dark, starry night. Slightly entranced, Alphys walked over to it, admiring it. She heard Mettaton trot up, carrying three other dresses. "Why did you wander off? How can I help you clothes shopping if you go-" he paused for a moment, seeming to examine the dress. Wordlessly, he picked one up, and put it over his arm with the others. "Right. You try these on, I'll just be looking at the makeup for a moment." Alphys took the pile of dresses and brought them into the fitting room. They were nice- a navy spaghetti-strapped one with ruffles around the neckline, a floaty fuchsia one made seemingly entirely out of gauze and an off the shoulder green dress, but she'd known from the moment she saw it that the black dress was the one. She still tried all of them on, twirling in front of the mirror, but her resolve only strengthened the fact that she was going to wear this black dress on her date! She came out with the four dresses, and managed to find Mettaton examining different brushes. "Which one, which one!" he exclaimed excitedly as soon as he noticed Alphys. She held up the black one and he nodded. "I thought so. Need anything else?"
"No, no! The dress is fine!" Alphys replied. Mettaton raised a robotic eyebrow, but didn't respond other than that. Alphys walked next to Mettaton up to the cashier. "I only need the black one!" she squeaked when Mettaton placed all four dresses (and a large bottle of hairspray) on the counter.
Mettaton fixed her with a look. "Do you like the other dresses?"
"Yes?"
"Good. You always want more than one nice dress."
Mettaton insisted on paying for the clothes- "I'm a celebrity, darling, what else will I spend money on?" and on taking Alphys to four other shops- nail varnish, different nail varnish that was actually lizard-monster friendly, shoes, and finally, a cafe. Alphys swung her legs under the table as she stared into her cup of coffee. "Thanks, Mettaton." she said, after a long silence.
"Don't mention it!" Mettaton waved his hands theatrically. "I love helping you shop, really. And I look forward to hearing how this date goes." Alphys laughed nervously, and sipped her coffee. She felt her feet brush the bag as she swung them, and felt a tickle of excitement. "And if you want any more help- makeup, hair-"
"Remember, I taught you makeup!" Alphys giggled. Mettaton looked surprised for a moment, before laughing with her.
"So you did!" he said. "In that case, don't listen to me. Just have fun." Mettaton took a look at his watch. "Ah. I have somewhere to be in a few minutes. Well, this was lovely, darling! I hope we can do this again!"
"Bye, Mettaton!" Alphys called, waving. This was going to be great. She could feel the excitement to show Undyne her new dresses. She took another sip of coffee. Yes. This would be amazing.
I love describing clothes. Mostly because I get to make Pinterest boards.
A montage of various scenes throughout Alphys and Mettaton's "friendship."
Wow, Mettaton sucks as a friend, so like. Yeah. He needs to chill. Don't worry, he does, it has a happy ending.
"This is it? The new body?" His thin, whispy voice echoed through the tiny room.
"W-well, this is just a sketch, so-"
"It's PERFECT! Perfect, darling!" he floated up to the blueprint to get a better look. The dramatic silhouette! The shoulder pads! The HEELS! He couldn't believe his eyes! Finally… a perfect body. "Thank you, Alphys!" he said, turning to her with wet eyes.
"L-listen, I've not even started-" Alphys protested before he pulled her into a hug. "...but I can right away!" she squeaked. "We could, um, go to the dump right now? Find some parts?"
"That sounds excellent!" he said, floating towards the door as his outline fizzled with excitement. A body! A body he could be happy in! And a best friend to boot! This might be, without a doubt, the best thing that has ever happened to me!
~🤍~
"What do you mean, it isn't ready?" he asked, infuriated as he glowed red.
"W-well, I've been kind of b-b-busy-"
"What could possibly be more important that my body?"
Alphys muttered something. "What?"
"Mew Mew Kissy Cutie Box Set."
"What?"
"Mew Mew Kissy Cutie Box Set! Look, I was going through the dump, and I just found it lying there and I've been watching it, I'm on episode 47 already and there's 84-"
"You're telling me. That my body. Is less important. Than a cartoon?!"
"No! Jeez, I just wanted a break from working on that thing!" Alphys huffed angrily. "Why do you have a problem with that?" He suddenly realised how rude what he'd said was. "Sorry. I just can't wait for it to be finished! It's going to be fabulous!"
Alphys nervously looked up. "Would you like to watch some episodes with me?"
"...Fine." He didn't like the silly cartoon, but he figured he probably owed it to Alphys after getting so worked up about something so stupid. So, he sat down on the couch next to Alphys and let her explain every plot detail up until that point.
~🤍~
"Alphys, darling? It's meeee!"
Alphys wrinkled her face. She didn't want to talk to Mettaton right now. The patients weren't responding to the doses, and she was getting letters, and having to work on that dumb, sexy body-
"I've come to ask about-"
"Your new body, yes, no, it isn't done." Alphys sighed. "Look, I'm really busy, okay?"
She'd expected a polite response. Maybe an apology for forgetting Alphys was the royal scientist now and actually had to do her job. Instead, what she got was,
"Well, so am I, Alphys. That body represents my hopes and dreams, and my viewer count is rising every broadcast! I need. It. Done."
"You know, it isn't my job to be your personal engineer!" Alphys exclaimed. "I'm the royal scientist! I have to do the tests for the things I've been asked to look into! Besides," she added lamely. "I thought you liked this one anyway."
"Well… yes…" Mettaton wheeled uncomfortably. "But it was always a prototype, so I don't know why you're surprised."
Alphys didn't want to be angry with him. But she could tell he was angry with her. "You know what, I'm going to be late." Mettaton wheeled out the door. "Hope you can finish soon!"
As the door closed, Alphys slumped against a wall. It was so much easier when Mettaton was just another monster that it just so happened that Alphys could help. She missed infodumping about anime and him doing her nails and fussing about her clothes. It's fine. she thought. I'll finish these experiments… I'll finish his body…
It'll be fine.
~🤍~
"Oh, Alphys!" Mettaton waited for a moment as his robotic voice echoed through an empty lab. "Alphys, I'm here for an update! You said there was an update!" And he'd found the most darling dress for her, as an apology for how he'd acted a few weeks ago, which he would have done over the phone but Alphys hadn't been picking up recently. He could see the lift doors were open, so he wheeled inside, assuming Alphys was on the second floor.
Entering the second floor of the lab, he was struck by how dark it was. How could Alphys work with all the lights off? Probably watching anime in her pyjamas again- "Alphyyyyyys! I have something for youuuuu!" Mettaton switched his screen into a torch and wheeled forward, down the hall. He knew where she'd be if she was anywhere in the lab- the TV room she'd installed.
Aha! Her voice was coming from just ahead, possibly a little higher pitched and panicked than usual but Mettaton assumed two characters she liked had looked at each other for too long and continued in.
Only to be met by Alphys surrounded by misshapen, dripping, slimy creatures that all turned to look at him, making agitated noises. "Mettaton!?" Alphys squeaked. "You shouldn't be here- I can exp-p-p-plain, just, t-turn off the torch-"
"What. Is. That?" Mettaton asked, horrified.
"L-L-Listen, I'll explain everything, just not here, you're making them edgy-"
Then a familiar voice emanated from one of the shambling creatures. A voice he hadn't heard in a while. "Hapstablook?"
Mettaton snapped his torch over to the one that had spoken. It was slimy and a little snakelike, with two muscular arms, strangely familiar eyes and large fangs. "How does it know that name?" he snapped at Alphys.
A trio of voices choruses from the same creature, layering so it was hard to tell what any of them were saying, but what it sounded like it was trying to say was,
"It's me… (who the hell…) Shyra… (blorp)"
Mettaton stared at it closer. Looking around the other creatures, it became more and more obvious. "What happened to them?" Mettaton asked Alphys.
"W-w-well, it-t-t's a long s-s-s-story, b-b-but, I-"
"You did this?" Mettaton asked incredulously.
"No! Y-yes! I made a mistake!" Alphys pleaded. "I d-didn't mean to- don't touch them!" she added as Mettaton reached a tentative hand out.
"These… these are monsters?" Mettaton said, asking for clarification.
"Y-yes. They… were." Alphys said. "Th-they'd already fallen down- they would be dead otherwise!"
"Dead? What the hell is this, Alphys?"
"They melted!" Alphys shrieked, cutting through the air like a knife that silenced every other noise. "They melted…. Together…"
Mettaton stared at her. "You…"
"I d-d-d-didn't mean to, it w-w-was an accident- Come back!"
As Mettaton wheeled back through the corridor, Alphys chased him desperately. "Please, don't tell anyone, no one can know!"
"What, that you melted their family members? I think they definitely should know."
Alphys pushed in front of him, blocking his way to the lift. "I-If you tell anyone… I'll tell your cousin who you are."
"You wouldn't." Mettaton scoffed, although as he said it, he doubted the statement. After all, he didn't know Alphys had it in her to melt people, she could have it in her to blackmail. "I would." Alphys's voice was quiet. "Please, just… don't tell anyone."
Both of them were silent for a long time.
"Fine." Mettaton said finally. "But just know that what you're doing is evil. And I'm not friends with evil people."
And with that, he wheeled past her.
~🤍~
Alphys didn't want to call him.
Not after the fiasco of their last conversation. But, he was her only hope for this plan to work. So, staring at the human on the monitor, hands shaking, she rang his number.
"You have reached the voicemail of: Mettaton, darling. Please leave a message."
"H-hi, Mettaton. I-It's me. Alphys. I, um… I… I found something on the cameras you might want to see."
"Well then?" the other end of the line responded rudely. Alphys jumped, pulling the phone away from her ear to see that he'd switched the call over to facecam. Alphys wordlessly turned the phone to face the screen where the human seemed to be sitting by a door, huddled in a pile. "That's a-"
"A human. Yep." Alphys said. "And, I… had an idea."
"Well?"
"Listen, that human just got into view of my good Waterfall cameras. Probably no one in the Underground knows about this!"
"And?"
"S-so I was thinking… maybe… I-I could, um… we could… work together?"
"To do what?"
"W-well, I bet your fans would r-really like to see a real live human?"
Alphys waited for a response. "They would, yes. What's this idea?"
So Alphys explained. How she'd be helpful Doctor Alphys, royal scientist and human fan, and Mettaton would be the malfunctioning killer robot. He stayed silent basically the whole time, waiting until Alphys had finished explaining. Hopefully. Or he'd hung up and she was talking to herself. "W-well?" she said finally.
"I think that's not a half bad idea." Mettaton replied.
"Oh! Good! Yes! Amazing! I'll, um… come to the lab and we can… set stuff up!"
~🤍~
"-all so she can convince you she's the good person… that she's not."
For a moment, Alphys had thought he'd forgiven her. Or forgotten about it. He'd gone along with most of her plan up until this point. Until suddenly, he rearranged the entire CORE, hired mercenaries to attack the human and locked her out of the room. She tried a few more times to push the door open, before slumping to the ground defeatedly. She curled herself up into a ball, tears rolling down her face. She should have known. Mettaton still hated her, the human probably hated her now too. Staring out over the edge of the platform, past the thin, fragile railing, the pulse of the CORE's light was almost beckoning. "Come on," it seemed to say. "No one would miss you. Jump."
Alphys couldn't bring herself to stand, though.
She'd screwed up.
Just like she did when making Mettaton's first body, just like when Asgore told her to research human SOULs, just like when Mettaton had stormed off after finding out.
Screw up.
Stupid.
Villain.
The words orbited in her mind as she trembled. Until suddenly, pink smoke began to leak through the door.
He hadn't- he wouldn't!
But Alphys knew how the EX body worked, and knew that if Mettaton was going to fight with it like she could hear him saying, it wouldn't stand a chance.
He wouldn't stand a chance.
She had to get this door open.
~🤍~
Watching her second sunset from Undyne's shoulders as the many, many monsters made their way down the mountain, Alphys stared across at the city in the distance. What would it be like? Surface life… terrifying. But also exciting!
A familiar whirring caught her attention as Mettaton ran up, clearly enjoying having legs. "Ah. Hello, Alphys. Er. Can I have a word?" Alphys nodded nervously, before he added, "In private. Or, as private as you get in a crowd like this."
Alphys slid down from Undyne's shoulders, and followed Mettaton over to the edge of the crowd. "Listen, I thought about what happened… and what I said… and I just wanted to say…" He took a deep breath. "I'm sorry. For… everything."
"Everything?"
"I was ungrateful, and cruel. Truthfully, you've helped my dreams come true, and in turn, I treated you like trash."
"Not like it was undeserved…" Alphys tried to joke.
"Of course it was undeserved!" Mettaton insisted. "Look, I'm… I'm going to try to be better. No more bossing, no more guilt tripping, no more… rudeness. And you have my full permission to slap me if I try anything like that again."
"O-okay." Alphys stood next to Mettaton for a moment before he continued. "You're my best friend, you know that, right?"
"Of c-course! Y-you're mine!" Alphys replied, not sure how else to.
Two best friends, watching the sunset.
The end of one era and the beginning of another.
Hopefully, Alphys could convince Undyne and Mettaton to get along.
I don't think I like this, but Ao3 is an archive and I want to be able to find my old writing, so...
The goo was running down her hands.
It was sticky and disgusting and made all her senses want to crawl into a corner and die and it was all her fault.
She'd not been careful enough. She'd overdosed them with determination.
And now, staring up at the giant mass of fused monsters, all she could do was scream, scream, SCREAM-
"ALPHYS!"
Alphys sat up, gasping for breath. Moonlight shone through the curtains, illuminating their bedroom. Beside her, Undyne leaned closer. "Are you okay?"
Alphys couldn't speak, but nodded. She didn't feel okay, not in the slightest, but it wasn't real. It was a nightmare. She was in her bed, with Undyne. It was fine. But she felt like she was going to shake herself to pieces.
Undyne suddenly leaned in, pulling Alphys into a hug. "You're okay." she said. "You're alright. I'm here." Alphys leaned against Undyne, their scales brushing up against each other with a smooth, nice feeling, the quiet, slow vibration of Undyne's hum comforting. Undyne gently ran her hands over Alphys's spikes. "You're okay." she repeated.
Alphys could feel the tension leaving her body. She was okay. It was alright. Monsters were living safely on the surface, the amalgamates were with their families, she was with the love of her life.
Undyne looked down at her. "Better?"
"Yeah." Alphys replied softly.
"Okay. You ready to go back to sleep?"
"Mhm."
"Great." Undyne yawned, before lying down, her hair covering the pillow. Alphys lay down beside her, and felt Undyne wrap her arms around her. "Love you, Alphy."
"Love you, Undyne."
It was fine.
Everything was alright.
i'm so fucking lonely lol.
Alphys didn't want to be here.
She hadn't wanted to be shown through a sterile, too-bright lab by a monster that just kept smiling today.
She'd wanted to sleep in, watch anime and probably eat nuggets or something.
But no.
CW for Meltdowns
Having an Alphys evening/night. Yay.
Alphys didn't want to be here.
She hadn't wanted to be shown through a sterile, too-bright lab by a monster that just kept smiling today.
She'd wanted to sleep in, watch anime and probably eat nuggets or something.
But no.
She kept replaying the events leading up to this moment- being at Mettaton's last show, someone coming up behind her and asking if she was the one who'd made him, her saying yes and turning and it being Asgore, the king, who'd she'd been crushing on since she saw him on TV once, and he'd complimented her. Said she must be really smart to make a robot with a SOUL. And Alphys hadn't had the heart to correct him, and hadn't wanted to out Mettaton, so she'd nodded and smiled and then suddenly he was offering her a JOB and now she was here.
"And that's the whole lab!" the smiling monster said, heading towards the door. "If you need anything, don't hesitate to call!"
Ohhhhhhhh god.
Alphys felt shivers running down her entire body.
Boxes of her possessions were piled in the living area of the lab- because of course not only was she doing a new job but also moving- but they felt miles away and completely static, she couldn't possibly even consider unpacking them. Instead she just crouched uncomfortably- better that than touch the weird floor with plastic tiles- the seams of all her clothes digging into her as she pressed her claws against her head.
This wasn't right, this wasn't normal, this wasn't where she should be. She should be at home where all her stuff was, except it wasn't, it was upstairs in boxes and she needed to unpack it and move furniture and organise and now there were tears rolling down her face and the makeup she'd forgotten to wash off from yesterday was running down her face with it and it felt weird and gross-
Someone was calling her.
The vibration was going through her thigh.
Alphys pulled out her phone. Through her tears, she could read "Catty <3".
She didn't want to answer, but did anyway. Catty would be worried if she didn't. "H-hi." she said hoarsely.
"Hi, Alphys!" Catty mewed. "Me and Bratty, like, heard about you getting hired! That's, like, so COOL!""Mhm."
"Hey, uh, are you, like, okay?" Catty asked.
Alphys nodded. That was dumb. Catty couldn't see her. And she was lying anyway. "Yep." she said.
"You don't, like… sound okay." Catty said. "You know what? I'm calling Bratty, we're coming over. Like, see you then, girl!"
"No, no, you don't-" Catty had already hung up.
Alphys slumped a little. Catty and Bratty were gonna come over. She should at least get off the floor. Plus her knees were starting to hurt. She managed to stand up without bursting into tears, and found her way to where the elevator to the living area was. Bratty had texted her- "omw bestie!!!<3<3<3". It'd be fine. Her friends were gonna help her unpack.
She'd be able to chill, and watch anime, just afterwards.
Besides, she'd impressed Asgore, right? That wasn't a bad thing! That was good! Even if it was through lying!
By the time Alphys, Catty and Bratty were done, Alphys felt a lot better. She hadn't had much space before- now all her stuff could fit wherever. She'd been able to solve the weird floor in the actual lab by putting flip-flops in the elevator. If she was going down there, she could just wear those. She'd been able to set up her computer fine, her bed fine, everything was fine!
Alphys wasn't even sure what had stressed her out so much. It hadn't actually been too bad, even.
And now she and Bratty and Catty could listen to music and dance and probably get something to eat later.
As the J-pop flooded out of the speaker at just the right volume, Alphys felt like maybe this could work.
I want the world to know that halfway through writing this fic I was almost sick.
So yeah.
The writing's that bad.
This specifically is the Undertale ending branch where the human did pacifist up to Undyne, befriended her, then killed Mettaton. Because that ending is fucking miserable.
Undyne had known something was very, very wrong when Alphys had texted her.
"Goodbye."
No, no no no no. She'd just lost Asgore. She couldn't…
The lab door was locked. Shit. Undyne kicked it down. "ALPHYS!" she yelled as loudly as she could. "ALPHYS!"
There was a note on the floor.
Undyne picked it up, and, although the handwriting made it hard to read, managed to decipher it.
I'm sorry.
This is all my fault.
I don't deserve to be here, same as I don't deserve to be able to hide.
If you want to know what I've done,.go through the door. I left it unlocked.
-Alphys.
FUCK.
Undyne spotted the door, one she hadn't really paid attention to before, and raced in. An elevator. SHE DIDN'T HAVE TIME!
After what felt like an eternity, the doors opened, and Undyne ran down a strange dark hall. She couldn't think about what the hell this place was, though. She just had to go.
Undyne could faintly hear a strange scratching. She recognized it as the sound Alphys's claws made on the tiles in the upper lab? living area? she wasn't sure what to call it, and tried to follow it.
Until she ran past a room with a familiar yellow figure.
Undyne ran into the room. "Alphys!"
Alphys looked up, shocked. She'd put her glasses on the floor next to her, and Undyne could see tear tracks running down her face. "U-Undyne? What are you doing here-?!"
"Whatever you're doing, you can't." Undyne said. "You can't… I can't lose you too."
Alphys stared at her silently, like she couldn't believe that. Undyne stepped closer. "Whatever you think is your fault- Mettaton's death, A… Asgore's death- they aren't. The only person to blame is me and that human."
"Wh-what?" Alphys looked shocked that Undyne could think that. "I… I sent Mettaton to die. I could have killed that human, but I didn't, just so I could manipulate them into liking me, then watch uselessly as they…" Alphys trailed off. "Not to mention the stuff down here."
" I could have killed that human. But I didn't. I failed. And now more people are dead because of me." Undyne crouched, laying a hand on Alphys's shoulder. "Don't add yourself to that list."
Alphys stared at her for a long, terrifying moment before collapsing into Undyne, tears rolling down her face.
Undyne hugged Alphys, held her like if she let go she'd shatter.
The two just… sat there. Holding onto each other. Both thinking the horrors that human had inflicted were their fault. Both not wanting the other to let go.
Clinging together like a lifeline.